Wednesday, February 12, 2003

You always think it isn't going to get any worse.

I can feel a bruise coming up on my thigh. Right now it's just a rather unpleasant knot that hurts immensely to touch. My chest also hurts, but hopefully that's a fleeting pain. There's no knot there to speak of, and it doesn't feel like it's going to bruise. There are beads missing from my bracelet. The broken pieces were too small to salvage. Other beads are half broken, hanging off the bracelet with dangerous sharp edges. I have coffee streaked across my white shirt. But honestly, none of this really matters.

Yesterday's write-up about my suspicions of cheating on Mr. Dimmack's test resulted in the largest fight at Simmons High School this year. It was in my classroom. It was my desks that were being pushed back. It was my students that were fighting the most heated and angry fight I've ever witnessed. Mrs. Kimble came to help. Mrs. Snyder blocked the door. Before this morning, I could say that I'd never broken up a fight. Before this morning, I could say that I'd never had to physically restrain somebody. This morning brought a lot of firsts. A lot of losses of innocence, on my part and theirs. The whole thing scared the crap out of me. I'm not sure that I'll ever see my classroom in the same way again.

Heather at 9:12 AM

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